


LoveCorrupted

by clawofglory



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Romance, F/F, Lesbian Evil Queen | Regina Mills, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-06
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:40:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 15,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26322799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clawofglory/pseuds/clawofglory
Summary: "It's just, I see the way you look at her - I've seen that look before-" Mary Margaret begins confidently, but unsure whether to continue. But she looks to see Regina staring at her expectantly. "It's the way you looked at Daniel." Mary Margaret flinching and bracing herself for Regina's response..."When you killed her, you killed me. I could have been happy. I could have been good. You made me!" Regina rips out her own dark heart and shoves it at Snow. "You made this."
Relationships: Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan
Comments: 8
Kudos: 85





	1. I won't be the one to say it

**Author's Note:**

> So for this story (and practically all my Swan Queen ones) follows the assumption that Daniel was a woman, and Regina has always been a lesbian.  
> Timeline is: season 2 in Storybrooke, when Emma is given nearly full custody of Henry and everyone remembers their lives in the Enchanted Forrest.  
> This chapter is full on Angst, but promises for sq fluff later, but the angst lingers indefinitely.

Regina stops by the apparent to drop of Henry for his time with Emma.

Emma answers the door and looks straight past Regina to Henry. "Hey kid, I've missed you," she says rumpling his hair as he hugs her leg, Regina's brow furrowing at being ignored.

Henry runs into the interior of the apartment to say hi to Mary Margaret as Regina remains at the threshold. She leans in closer as a threat, "Miss Swan, I suggest you not let anything happen to him or you'll have to deal with me." She continues darkly grabbing, her nails stabbing into Emma's arm that was draped across her chest "And you haven't seen anything yet." Regina lets go and steps back continuing with a more professional demeanor, "Are we clear?"

"Uh- Yeah. Crystal," Emma stammers a little thrown off by what just happened.

"Good," Regina quips as she flips her hair over her shoulder and strides away. Emma stands there dumbfounded just watching her walk away.

Mary Margaret comes up to Emma after she shuts the door, "How was that? That looked intense."

"Nothing I can't handle," Emma brushes off.

* * *

When Regina comes by to retrieve Henry she was an entirely different person. She was pleasant and appreciative. Henry bubbles with excitement to tell Regina about all the fun he has had. Emma turns to leave her be as Henry runs off to get his stuff, but Regina stops her by grabbing her wrist, this time much gentler "I - uh- just wanted to say thank you for -uh- taking such good care of Henry. He seems really happy," she says smiling. "I don't know that I've ever seen him so happy," she continues her voice betraying her ruse that she is only happy, not instead sad that she could not bring Henry such profound happiness.

Emma just weakly smiles. "Uh- my hand" she says noticing that in Regina's sadness she never let go.

"Oh- um - sorry," Regina lets go. Emma being not quite sure but thinking she saw her wipe away a tear with her now free hand.

Regina brings Henry back to the apartment "You ready kid? Were going on an adventure!" Emma asks through her big grin.

Henry quickly rushes past both his mothers to beat Emma outside. "Be careful you might slip," Regina calls after him futilely.

"Bye, Madam Mayor," Emma says confident as she passes by, brushing against Regina on her way out after Henry.

"Uh- Regina," Snow calls from inside the kitchen, "Do you have a minute?"

Regina steps inside. "Now what could you want?" Regina demands.

"I - uh- I - do you want to sit down? would you like so tea?" Snow stammers.

"Mary Margaret, I really don't have time for a pointless rendevouiz right now. I have pressing city business to get back to. If this is all you needed, I will see myself out." Regina turns to leave.

"No - uh- it's about- " Mary Margaret starts leaving Regina hanging, "Emma."

"Emma?" Regina turns back around Cheshire grin upon her face.

"You know I never told anyone about your secret," Mary Margaret confesses as she turns away to put a kettle on.

Regina scoffs. "I find that extremely hard to believe seeing as how Daniel is dead. And this has nothing to do with Emma. I'm leaving!"

"It will." Snow replies. "No obviously, I know you know I told Cora. I told you so, and there's not a day that goes by I don't regret that... " she trails off. "But I meant everyone else. I could have when you spread all those lies against me. I could have exposed you to the entire kingdom, so they would turn on your more, but that wouldn't be fair. Nobody should be ridiculed for love." Mary Margaret comes around the bar to where Regina is sitting, wanting to reach out to comfort her step-mother but not sure if she would allow such a motion. So she just looks at her softly. Regina's eye twitches and she stands up brushing her skirt straight and quickly wiping her eye.

"If you're not ready to talk about it, it's okay. I just thought you might be, now. And what better person to talk to than someone who already knows and has accepted you despite everything. I was a child before and I didn't know how the world saw people like you and now as an adult to me it still makes no sense."

"People like me? How so? What are you talking about?" Regina questions each question with increasing anger. The kettle echoing in true. "You don't know me," Regina dares darkly.

"I won't be the one to say it," Mary Margaret replies simply, "nor will I make you."

Mary Margaret gets up and goes back to get the kettle. "I see you're not ready to talk my mistake," she says passing across the bar a tea mug. "I'm sorry to have upset you."

"What did this have to do about Emma?" Regina asks confused.

"It's just, I see the way you look at her - I've seen that look before-" Mary Margaret begins confidently, but unsure whether to continue. But she looks to see Regina staring at her expectantly. "It's the way you looked at Daniel." Mary Margaret flinching and bracing herself for Regina's response.

Regina remains there composed, not moving, lips pressed, eyes closed, like the calm before a storm. She reaches out for the mug taking a sip. Mary Margaret lets out the breath she didn't know she was holding. Then Regina goes to gracefully set the cup back down, when she suddenly changes its course and she hurls it off towards the wall, shattering splintering into a million pieces. "That's-" Regina catches her breath, "that's what you did to my heart," she yells, "when you killed Daniel!"

"I never- " Mary Margaret interrupts.

"Killed, had her killed, SEMANTICS! She's dead! Because you lived. Because I saved you." Regina sobs.

Mary Margaret turns away. "When you killed her, you killed me. I could have been happy. I could have been good. You made me!" Regina rips out her own dark heart and shoves it at Snow. "You made this."

Mary Margaret looks down at the blackened blob before her. "I know. I know and I am so sorry."

"Just crush it" Regina harps. "Finish the job. Finish what you started. Kill me," She pleads.

"Regina, no!" Mary Margaret grasps. "You - I - you have plenty to live for."

"Really? And what is that? A son who prefers your daughter? Who you all *let* me visit. Even after I took care of him alone for eleven years. No friends or family to speak of," Regina quips. "All I have is blackened heart!" She yells breaking down into tears. "Please just crush it. If you ever cared even a little about me. Please," Regina begs.

And at that moment suddenly the door opens. Regina quickly grabs her heart from Snow's hand and shoves it back in her own chest. In walks Emma and Henry and Regina acts as normal and confident as ever. "What happened here?" Emma asks eying the shattered pieces on the floor. Mary Margaret goes to speak but finds hardly any voice so only Regina's answer of "Nothing. I was just leaving," is heard as she turns and grabs her purse. Mary Margaret looks up at her with tears welling in her eyes. "Goodbye, Henry," Regina stoops to hug him on her way out.


	2. What really is normal?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regina wants to talk more about her past and future. Eventually coming to a brighter conclusion (after more self loathing) with the support of M+M.

"Emma maybe you should let Regina see Henry more" Mary Margaret suggests.

"Yeah right. It seems like you guys had a peaceful time when I was gone." Emma gestures at the ceramic pieces on the floor.

"No we were just talking. It- slipped." Mary Margaret defends.

"You know about my super power," Emma frowns. "Why are you covering for her?" she questions exasperated.

"It's just- I think it would be good for her. That's all." Mary Margaret replies squeezing Emma's shoulder in support as she turns to go.

"What about what's good for Henry?" Emma asks.

"I think it would be good for him too. She's all he had until just recently." Mary Margaret counters earnestly, a weak smile forming on her lips to soften the blow.

Emma flinches from the emotional retort. "If you really think it's best," Emma responds weakly.

~0~

Once Regina leaves she drives home on auto pilot. The big house mocking her with the echos of her heels on the hard wood floor. She throws herself in the shower to numb the pain collapsing onto the floor letting the water beat upon her as tears well up in her eyes. She rips her heart out to feel less pain, but she doesn't, she only feels more pain because she no longer feels the love Daniel or Henry once had for her, so she shoves it back in, reluctantly. She comes out of the shower wrapping herself in her robe and props herself up upon her bed. Sitting there just thinking. A while passes before she decides to walk over to Henry's room. The sight of it empty overwhelms her with emotions as she decides to crawl into the tiny bed and tuck herself in. She thinks about all the anger she's had and how that has held her together thus far, but with the stars zooming around Henry's room from the nightlight, all she can feel is sorrow and regret for letting her life get here, surrounded by the walls she build herself.

In the morning, Regina finds herself outside of Dr. Hopper's office. She leans herself against the wall debating whether to go in or not. As she is pressing her hand to her temple Archie comes out the door. "Oh, I'm sorry Madam Mayor. I didn't see you there." he stutters. "Were you coming in?" he points his thumb inside.

"If you insist." she responds. As he opens the door leading her in she follows sitting on the sofa. Crossing her hands upon each other she pauses "Um- I don't know where to begin, so I guess I'll just come out and say it. I'm a - I like- I - well this is a lot harder than I thought. Well you see I'm not normal." She states.

"What really is normal?" Archie muses.

"I like women," She states dryly.

"Oh I see. Well many individuals experience same sex attraction throughout their lifetime. When did you first notice you felt this way? And at what point did you discover how society views this type of behavior? And how did that make you feel?"

"That's all you've got. You really are useless," Regina replies to herself.

"What was that?" He did inquires having only heard mumbling.

"Nothing," Regina replies as she blows a memory charm over him so that he forgets this conversation ever happened.

"Madam Mayor, what are you doing here?" asks Archie startled.

"I - uh- do you think Henry will ever forgive me for lying to him and denying his reality during the curse?" Regina asks thinking of a truth faster than a lie.

"Well, Madam Mayor, Henry is a very special boy with strong belief and if you show him you're sorry and make emends to do better, there's no telling what could happen. You just have to try," Dr. Hopper explains.

"Thank you, that will be all," Regina gathers herself and leaves clearing her throat to try and rid herself of the lump now there.

"Anytime!" He calls from inside.

Regina knocks on the door to the apartment. Mary Margaret answers "Hi, sorry Regina. Henry's not here."

"Well, that's okay. I'm not here to see him," Regina smiles weakly, nervously brushing a stand of hair behind her ear. "I wanted to speak with you. Are you alone?" Regina strides inside.

"With me?" Snow questions innocently.

"Yes. I uh- wanted to talk about before." Regina muses avoiding eye contact "I think I may have been a bit-" Regina pauses searching for the word, "dramatic," she finishes.

"That's one word for it." Snow says under her breath, meet with daggers from Regina.

"And maybe you're right." Regina continues "Maybe I should talk to someone after all... Were you offering before?" Regina gestures vaguely.

"Are you sure you wouldn't rather talk to Dr. Hopper?" Mary Margaret probes. "He's very good."

"I did; he's unhelpful," Regina replies bitterly, plucking at the fabric of her sleeve.

"Oh, what did he say?" Snow asks with genuine concern.

"Nothing he'll remember," Regina says quietly with a devious smirk.

"What about Sidney?" Snow suggests "He's been your mirror. I'm sure you've talked to him lots?"

"If you don't want to, just tell me no," Regina dares darkly getting up in Mary Margaret's face "Always with you hero types so polite beating around the bush. Someone should tell you nice is different than good," she muses backing away.

"Oh Regina, if you really want to talk to me, I'll listen," Snow gushes. "I owe you that much and so much more, after what I did." Mary Margaret comforts.

"So you take responsibility now?" Regina nearly states, words laced with venom.

"I was a child," she instantly defends. "My intentions were good, but it still lead to bad things happening. Because I didn't listen. Because I didn't listen. to you," Mary Margaret confesses on the verge of tears. "There were just so many things I didn't know..." Mary Margaret trails off. "You know when I saw you and Daniel. I knew it was love, true love. It was just so beautiful. I knew then that I wanted that for myself someday, not an arranged marriage." Mary Margaret muses as tears well up in Regina's eyes. "I didn't think anyone would want to stand in the way of true love." Snow brakes down into tears, repeatedly crying "I'm sorry" as Regina tirades.

"That's right, you didn't THINK!" Regina yells through her own tears threatening to spill. "I knew how people would see me, how my mother would see me. But you knew NOTHING of the world and still thought you knew better! And that arrogance had a cost," Regina fumes, protectively crossing her wrists together at her stomach.

"I know. I know. And I'm sorry," Mary Margaret pleads grabbing Regina's hands. "I destroyed your true love before, which is why I want to help you now." Regina pulls her hands away. "I know you're scared of being hurt again. But in the end it's worth it to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all."

"Is it?" Regina spits bitterly. "Easy for you to say! You have your- Charming! Because from where I'm standing. All I'm left with is weakness and the haunting feeling of bitter memories. I would have rather stayed ignorant."

"You don't mean that," Mary Margaret counters. "You're saying you would trade away all your good memories with Daniel to-"

"-Yes," Regina interrupts unsure if she is lying, but needing to feel confident and in control. "I would."

"You know I will always believe that there is good in you. I've seen it. I've seen you love. You taught me about selfless love for strangers. I know that that nugget of humanity will always remain," Snow believes earnestly. She takes a deep breathe before continuing, "Once when Charming was betrothed to another I took a potion to forget him to forget my pain... It turned me into someone I wouldn't recognize. Without love, all we are left with is hatred. But if you focus on the love, even lost love, really cherish it, it can change you. Love is goodness." Mary Margaret gushes. "You always focused on the anger and vengeance, never on the love. Maybe it's time you tried something different. Because it hasn't brought you happiness. Strength maybe, but at what cost?" Snow finishes.

Regina remains silent, deep in thought taking in Snow's words, desperately wanting to curse or argue with the brunette, but not finding the strength to do so.

Snow decides to leave her alone with her thoughts and goes to fetch some water for the both of them. "Thank you," Regina says quietly when Snow hands her the glass. They sit in silence just drinking the water and occasionally staring up at one another. "What if I wanted to change?" Regina muses, interrupting the silence, gazing off into the distance.

"I support you," Mary Margaret concedes.

"Even if it's with your daughter?" Regina asks weakly.

"Even if it's with my daughter," Mary Margaret echos confidentially. Silence fills the room once again.

"Do you think- does Emma- is she-" Regina gushes much unlike herself but rather like a schoolgirl.

"-Well to be honest, I haven't known her that long you'll have to find that out for yourself," Mary Margaret replies with a smile.


	3. This will be fun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mary Margaret kind of sets Emma and Regina up on a date to the arcade with Henry.

"You have to stop demonizing his mother. She may have been the evil queen, but she still raised him. She still loves him," Mary Margaret pleads to Emma, "even in her messed up way, but she does. Do it for Henry. Don't corrupt his love he once had for her."

~0~

Regina brings Henry back to be with Emma after their visitation. "Thanks for- uh- letting me spend more time with Henry," Regina confesses uneasy with the vulnerability it brought.

"No problem," Emma replies instantly, flashing Regina a smile. "C'mon kid," Emma hollers to Henry, "We are going to the arcade down by the docks!"

"Yes!" Henry exclaims.

"Maybe you could take Regina with you?" Snow suggests from the kitchen.

Emma throws Snow a look of daggers but then pauses debating it. "Yeah sure, why not? Madam Mayor, would you like to accompany us to the arcade?" Emma asks in a fake overly chivalrous manner.

"I would love to spend more time with MY son," Regina replies possessively. As she glances over Emma's shoulder she sees Snow giving her grin and thumbs up from the kitchen, requiring all her restraint to not roll her eyes at Snow's pitiful attempts to set them up.

The two walk out side by side as Henry runs ahead in excitement.

"Get a load of this kid," Emma gestures to their son. "Kid's so excited it's like he's never been to an arcade."

"That's because he hasn't." Regina counters defensively. "Video games rot your brain,"

"Mhm," Emma sighs. "This will be fun," she thinks. "Why did Mary Margaret want me to bring her?"

But it turns out the trio had lots of fun. Regina's face lit up almost as much as Henry's under all the lights. So much laughing and smiling. Regina couldn't remember when she had that much fun. Being out of her element, she let Emma take the lead on everything, which Emma enjoyed: bossing the bossy mayor around.

Emma taught them both how to play Skee-Ball and holding their hands teaching them to throw. They raced cars and cheered each other on. They played ice hockey and Regina's competitive edge came out. Regina scoffed at Whack-a-Mole such a peasant's game, but Henry loved it anyway.

Regina was horrible at pinball. Emma asked if she could help. "I don't need any help Miss Swan," Regina grunts as she misses yet another ball.

"Let me help you. You're so close. You're timing is just off. Here," Emma says reaching around Regina standing close behind her and placing her hands over Regina's, helping press them down to hit the button at just the right moment. Regina felt such an odd sensation being quite so close to Emma. It made her brain foggy, which apparently was good for pinball for together they got the high score, or maybe Regina was just determined to keep the game going a bit longer.

The minute the game is over Emma disengages with Regina's body. "Good game," Emma goes to high five Regina who still foggy holds her hand up halfheartedly. "I guess we make a pretty good team."

"I guess we do," Regina confirms noncommittally. Brushing her hands against her skirt, as if trying to remove all feeling of Emma's hands in hers.

"C'mon Henry lets go turn in your tickets and get some ice cream," Emma calls.

Henry picks himself out a stuffed dog. "Emma, I still have extra tickets left. What else should I get?" Henry asks.

Emma looks down at the display case then winks up at Regina as she talks to Henry her eyes never moving from Regina's. Regina becomes slightly tingly under Emma's gaze.

"What about a little gift for your mom? What about that heart necklace over there?" she points.

"Great idea!'" He exclaims.

Henry hands the plastic heart to Regina "Oh thank you, Henry, it's beautiful," she cooes.

"Here, I'll help you put it on," Emma says taking the necklace out of her hands.

Maybe Regina was reading too much into this. But when Emma's hands gently pull aside her hair, her hands nearly caress Regina's neck. They linger far too long that Regina leans into her touch. Emma clasps the necklace accompanied by a sharp intake of breath with a quick regret. Regina eyes the other woman skeptically following as she pulls away and Emma just looks sheepish under her hot gaze. Maybe Regina was not reading too much into this.

Maybe Regina had never been reading too much into this. All the times they had fought, been too forceful, too close, too heated leading themselves down a destructive spiral towards each other. Maybe there had always been more than pure unadulterated hate. When they instinctively knew just the sore spots to poke each other and gladly did it to provoke a reaction. When Emma had shoved her against the wall, all emotions uncapped from Henry, being too close to Emma feeling her ragged breath hot against Regina's resolve was too much for her to keep up this facade.

Regina stands off by herself looking at the sea. Emma yells to Regina from the ice cream line, "You sure you don't want any? I'm buying."

"No, I'm buying, Swan," Regina slides up beside her and slaps some cash on the counter. Emma flinches slightly but then orders two chocolate cones, handing one to Henry.

Henry runs about eating his ice cream and playing with his new dog in the sand, while Emma and Regina sit on a near by bench watching him.

"You know you're- different than I thought," Emma muses to break the silence.

"And what did you think before?" Regina challenges, a skeptical brow raising.

"I thought you were an evil bitch," Emma says nonchalantly taking a bite of her ice cream.

"That's evil witch," Regina quips, but she smiles.

"No, pretty sure I meant bitch," Emma confirms. Regina stares ruefully down at her hands in her lap.

They both return to watching Henry.

"Are you sure you don't want some?" Emma asks extending her cone to Regina. "I'm fine, Swan," Regina says her eyes focused on following Henry. "Ya sure? It's chocolate," Emma teases slightly wiggling the cone.

"What are you? a child?" Regina condescends turning away.

At that moment Emma notices that large glob of chocolate ice cream has fallen onto Regina's pale skirt. "Oh shit!" she exclaims. "I'm sorry," she winces. "Here, let me fix it. Hold this." She hands the cone to Regina and goes in her bag to grab a water bottle, which she dumps onto a napkin and dabs Regina's skirt. All before Regina even realized what was happening her brain's wandering to other situations with Emma's hand upon her thigh.

Embarrassed her own reaction, shaking off her day dream "It's fine. I'm fine," Regina says defiantly dusting Emma's hand off with her own and standing up. Regina proceeds to walk closer to Henry and crosses her arms over her chest as she looks out onto the water.

Try as she might her entire life to suppress her emotions, Regina always felt things deeply. Her icy drip and calculated quips, her confident strides, fireballs, and dagger eyes, all to keep people away from her innermost abandons but it seems a Miss Emma Swan has waltzed straight through the blockade unfazed by the defenses.

"Vulnerability is weakness," Regina seethes internally. "Wanting to see her face, feel her, removes my control, my power."


	4. Why are you like this?

"We're gunna go to dinner at Granny's," Emma states as fact, not an invitation. This attempt to signal an end to their time together, breaking Regina from her thoughts.

"I have work to do. I must be going," Regina replies, agreeable that the two should not spend more time together.

"Sorry about your skirt," Emma says in parting.

"I said I was fine," Regina deflects darkly, preferring not to entertain those thoughts again.

Emma swears under her breath, her hands swing in agitation, as she turns to walk away.

"But Miss Swan, If you ever soil my clothing again, consider it your final action," Regina warns the darkness lingering just below the surface.

Emma huffs off with harder steps though the sand as she returns to the car.

* * *

"How did your date with Emma go?" Mary Margaret asks nonchalantly, innocently poking the tiger. Easier to do with her home field advantage of Regina in her living room and the confidence bestowed upon her from sitting home alone eating vanilla ice cream from the carton, which is what she had been doing before Regina knocked.

"It wasn't a date," Regina contends aggressively. "I was spending time with my son."

Snow raises her hands in mock surrender. "My mistake," she defends barely audible. "You know Regina, you don't always have to be on the defensive with me? I've known you a long time," Snow reminds. "Seen you at your worst and your best. Ice cream?" Snow offers extending the carton she was previously eating as olive branch.

Regina stares wide eyed at the ice cream. Snow looks inquisitively at Regina.

"She brushed my thigh," Regina relays expectantly, with a sudden more agitated change of tone she continued "and ruined my skirt."

"Well, If things continue like this, I'm not so sure I'm going to want to hear the details about my step-mother's and my daughter's relationship." Mary Margaret jests. Regina frowns.

"Think about the how Henry feels, I'm already his grandma and his step-sister, imagine if I became- " Mary Margaret pauses to calculate their family tree "his step sister again?" she jokes.

"Why was that so hard?" Regina puzzles at the school teacher, "You're really fit to teach my son?"

"So have you two talked?" Mary Margaret changes the subject.

"No," Regina dismisses the notion.

"Can I give you some advice?" Mary Margaret offers.

"Did I ask for any?" Regina quips accompanied by a dark stare.

"Or maybe you could just start by calling her Emma?" Mary Margaret suggests.

Regina's demeanor suddenly changes, all of this too much for her, thoughts of the word "Emma" rolling off her lips in a moment of ecstasy. She knows from Rumple the power names hold and could hold over her, so she back-peddles stating, "I was wrong. I no longer like our arrangement of 'chatting.' I think we are done here." Regina moves swiftly toward the door. "And don't worry about your precious Emma. I'm not in the mood to deal with that petulant child anymore," and with that she slams the door to Mary Margaret's apartment and her heart, leaving behind a very flabbergasted Mary Margaret.

Regina glowers at the door after she makes her leave. This was a mistake. All of this was a mistake, she should have never let Emma get under her skin. Emma was a parasite sucking away all her power. And taking away the only person who could still sometime see good in her, her Henry. No no. Regina didn't like feeling this way. She used to run this town and control everyone in it. Now there's Emma the wildcard ruining all she worked to achieve. She kicks down a trash can angrily as she makes her way to the car. Once alone in the private confines of the vehicle she breaks down into tears. She quickly shakes herself from her own desolate state wipes her eyes and speeds off to an empty house.

* * *

Since their time at the arcade and Regina's revelation. Emma and Regina have been more at each other's throats than usual, Regina coping with her own feelings by pushing the younger woman away, far away, and Emma responding in turn, until it climaxed into a very public argument at Granny's.

Regina entered Granny's Henry in tow. Henry was looking down reading his book and walking. Regina's heels clicked across the floor and Emma sunk down into her bar stool clutching her coffee with fervor as she stares down at it, eyes unwilling to meet eyes with the dark women who just entered.

Then a lot of things happened in the space of a mere few seconds as a chain reaction. Regina stopped as she passed Emma to glower in her direction, causing Henry to run into her knees with his book, causing Regina to buckle backward and turn around to face Henry sternly, causing Henry to look up and notice Emma, yelling out her name, causing Emma to stand much too quickly in excitement without noticing her tight clamp on the coffee cup which remained in her hand as she reached out to hug her son, and as she did said coffee spilled all over the white blouse of the boy's other mother, who was angry before this interaction at Emma's mere presence.

Emma quickly notices what she did and a mortified look appears on her face. Regina pauses for a moment like the calm before the storm. "Miss Swan, do you remember what I said the last time your carelessness led to my wardrobe being sullied?" the piercing timbre of Regina's voice causing Emma to gulp.

Emma starts trying to explain the problem away. Regina with the flick of her hand shuts her up. Regina turns to face Henry "Henry, car," she requests. When the boy stands his ground, she commands more forcefully "Henry, car now!" and the boy scurries out of Granny's.

Regina releases her magical hold on Emma and she gasps for breath.

"Why are you like this!" Emma screams. "No wonder Henry doesn't love you," Emma grumbles.

"What was that, Miss Swan?" Regina dares darkly giving her a second chance she does not deserve. Emma says nothing, but stands her ground. "And you think you are a better mother?" Regina quips. "So childish, so selfish. You knew you could never be a mother, because you never had one." Regina let's the words hang in the air as she stares down Emma. "Aww poor baby!" Regina mocks, breaking eye contact with Emma, who suddenly doesn't look so strong. Regina continues the gruffness in her voice instantly recognizable to anyone who has encountered the Evil Queen "Perpetual child, you'd be more at home in Neverland! Running away shirking from all responsibilities..." Regina finishes her tirade words cutting into Emma's heart as she fights back tears. Regina turns on her heel to leave.

Emma calls out "And if you think you're a better mother, you're fooling yourself. I may not have not had one, but I know what a mother is, a good person. And a good person would never murder thousands of innocent people!" Emma continues gaining her strength to fight. Regina turns around to face Emma conjuring a fire ball in hand. The other diners taking cover under their tables. "Oh yeah and if I'm so childish, let me help you and do this," Emma says reaching over to the water pitcher on the bar grabbing it and dumping it over Regina's head, soaking her coffee covered blouse and splashing down upon her fireball.

"That's it!" Regina yells throwing the fireball in Emma's direction going swiftly past her shoulder. "I'm done playing nice! That was a warning shot and I never miss." She encroaches on Emma who puts her hands up in defense and backs away slowly as Regina walks forward fireball in hand.

"Hold on before you so something Henry will regret," Emma tries to talk her down gently.

"Don't tell me how to raise my son!" Regina commands darkly.

"Henry!" Emma utters surprised as the boy who had been watching from the window outside suddenly enters the diner.

"Mom!" Henry calls out, tears burning in his eyes.

Regina turns; her eyes soften and the fireball dissipates. "Henry," she cries. "Let's forget about this. Let's go home," she pleads to the little boy who looks upon her like a monster.

"You're not my Mother!" he yells wiping the snot from his nose and the tears from his eyes, "Emma's my mother! And I'm never going anywhere with you ever again! You promised! You really are the Evil Queen and you'll never! change!" and with that he turns running and crying out the diner door, leaving Regina stunned and injured as if he had stabbed her, falling down to her knees in pain radiating from her heart.

Emma can't help but feel sorry for the women who just a moment ago was maybe trying to kill her. She reaches out a timid hand to Regina's arm and gingerly says, "Let him go. He'll blow off some steam and this will all blow over. He's a kid."

Regina pulls her arm from Emma's grasp as she stands. "Don't tell me how to raise MY son!" Regina speaks in low dark tones.

"I'm gunna go after him," Emma says as she jogs past Regina and out the door.

Regina stands there dumbstruck. Then strides her way to the door, pausing before leaving and turning to the still hiding crowd. "Anyone else have a problem with how I raise my son?" she asks fireball in hand. Her question met by silence.

* * *

Regina goes to the middle of the woods to blow off her own steam. Feeling utterly alone and helpless and fuming with rage over Emma stealing her son. She lets out a primal scream and the magnitude of her emotion knocks down all the trees in a large circle surrounding her.

She sits down on a fallen trunk and cries. All she wanted was Henry back. He was all she had. He loved her once and she was sure and now she ruined it with her own vengeance. No no, she didn't ruin it; Emma Swan did, she tells herself. This is all Emma Swan's fault. She screams again and paces around this time collapsing in a heap on the forest floor her own tears pooling in her lap. She has nothing. She will never have anything. She will never get her happy ending. She's truly alone having killed or pushed away everyone she loved, well anyone weren't killed by trusting a little girl with a big secret. Her thoughts running away with her as she eventually crawls back up onto a fallen log.

Suddenly she hears a pop, and standing near her in the newly made clearing is none other than Rumpelstilzchen.

"What are you doing here?" she glowers.

"Hello Dearie, I heard the sounds of a women in distress," he replies snappily.

"Fuck off," she throws a lazy fireball in his direction, which he easily dodges.

"Turns out you and I, Dearie, have more in common than you might think," he informs her as he approaches her log.

"Gold, I'm really not in the mood for story time," she says throwing another lazy fireball in his direction.

"Oh well I think you'll want to hear this one. It will- uh- help you get your boy back," he says the last part of the sentence slammed together as if one word, followed by very Rumple-eske giggling. Maybe she isn't the only one reverting to their old ways Regina thinks.

"I'm listening," Regina replies drily, her curiosity peaked, but letting little on.

"You see, you and I, both strong sorcerers who's only tether to the world was our sons. They are all we had in our pitiful little lives besides power and darkness. And they despite all odds they wanted to believe the best in us, foolish children, because we would disappoint them again and again and again, falling back on our evil ways. But then in our effort to keep them with us we would push them away and choose power over love, because that's what villains do: choose vengeance over forgiveness. Squash our enemies to protect our family and in doing so cause our family to seek protection from us," he finishes with a grin.

"What's your point?" Regina asks daftly.

"Ya have to not do that." Rumple replies as if it is obvious.


	5. For Henry

Things were even more tense now and Regina grew more and more desperate to see Henry. Showing up at school, only to be shooed out. Trying to approach him after his sessions with Dr. Hopper, only to have him whisked away by Emma. Showing up at Emma's door, only to have it slammed in her face. All of these efforts only made Regina more angry at Emma for keeping her own son from her, again. The avoidance extended professionally as well Emma just ignoring asking Regina for anything. Emma wanted nothing more than to pretend Regina didn't exist and the whole town seemed on board.

Regina felt even more alone than ever. Citizens no longer paid any attention to her. She was snubbed at Granny's. Cut off in traffic. She felt like she was going insane. People crossed the street to avoid her. No one would even talk to her. It was like she was the Evil Queen all over again, but this time no one even feared her to the point of respect.

She sees Dr. Hopper up ahead. He tries to scurry down an alley as she calls after him. She catches up and confronts him. He squirms and then confesses to her that he doesn't think the plan of ignoring the mayor was really the best course of action and then rambles on about what that kind of isolation can do to a person ending his tangent with the question: "Madam Mayor, would you like to talk?"

"To Henry," is all she replies, full of vulnerability.

* * *

And eventually Regina was able to do just that. She finally caught up with Henry one day as he was walking home from school.

"Henry! Henry!" she called out. He kept walking with increasing determination, not unmatched by Regina who practically ran after him, her heels clacking on the sidewalk. "Henry! Henry can we talk? Please! Henry, I'm your mother!" she begs on the verge of tears.

"A mother wouldn't act like this!" He blasts into her face the intensity causing her to take a step back. "You just want to lock me up in a tower and keep me all to yourself, so dependent that I can't see - don't notice all the bad things you do!"

"That's not true," she defends.

"You lied to me! You made me think I was crazy!" He retorts, to which Regina has no response. He continues less mad and more hurt, "You tried to hurt Emma to keep her away." Henry stares wide eyed at his mother, giving her the chance to explain, to make him understand her choices.

Regina suddenly feels very small, smaller than the small boy before her. She has no response, no excuse for her actions. She was simply scared. Scared of Henry reacting just as he is now. Scared of Henry hating her and leaving her alone just like everyone has. She wanted a child so bad, someone to love her unconditionally, but it turns out even she can break that unconditional bond in her efforts to protect it. She corrupts love, in her efforts to preserve it she perverses it.

"Henry- I - I'm sorry," she chokes out, feeling defeated and worthless of his redemption.

He turns and walks away unable to deal with all the emotions swimming inside him, leaving Regina standing stunned to the spot, tears trailing her face as she watches him leave, her body unwilling to follow a boy who doesn't want to be followed any longer.

* * *

"You know your little stunt at the diner didn't fool everyone," Gold says over the counter in his Pawn Shop, not even bothering to look up from the piece he is cleaning at the guest who just entered. "The Regina I know doesn't fire warning shots. You. carry a torch for Miss Emma Swan, the Savior."

Regina shifts her weight uncomfortably from foot to foot.

"If you didn't -well- you have blown her off the map by now and I'd have no idea who we're talking about. Yes Dearie, I've known of your proclivities for quite some time now. My charms had no affect on you."

"I didn't come here to talk about this," Regina quips plainly, seeming unfazed by Gold's brashness and accurate assessment.

"Fair enough. And what can I do for you today, Madam Mayor?" he asks with a grin.

"I want Henry back," she pleads.

"Ya see, I already told ya how to just that. How bout you try it and come back later," he says magically pushing her out the door.

"Gold, let me in!" she bangs on the door.

He approaches the now locked door with a smile as he turns the open sign to closed.

Regina storms off.

* * *

Emma's boots click across the marble floor as she strides into the mayor's office file folder in hand. Unable to professionally avoid the dark haired woman any longer.

Slamming the folder down on the desk in front of Regina attempting to startle or anger her, Emma's not sure her intentions, but Regina doesn't even blink or look up from the document that she is reading. "The papers you asked for. Here you go, Madam Mayor," Emma spits words like venom.

"Thank you, Emma," Regina replies seemingly absent minded without taking a beat to look up from what she is reading so intently.

"Yeah, okay, _Regina_ ," Emma sneers turning on her heel. From a few steps away she half turns back, "What's your game?" Emma questions obvious confusion shows on her face.

"Game? no Game, dear," Regina replies innocently hints of darkness lingering under the tone of her words. "Now if you kindly would leave me to my work. I have work to do as I'm sure you do as well, Sheriff Swan." Regina finally looking up from her paper to raise an eyebrow, emphasizing the other woman's title.

Emma storms off.

* * *

When Emma arrives home that evening it is with a slam of the door and huff followed by a concerned look from Mary Margaret. "Aww honey," she comforts pulling Emma in for a hug. "Bad day?" she questions gingerly guiding Emma over to sofa.

"She's insufferable!" Emma declaims her body stiffening at the thought.

"Who, dear?" Mary Margaret asks, petting the back of an increasingly irritated Emma.

"You know damn well who," Emma replies darker than meaning to.

Mary Margaret sighs, "Well what did she do this time? Henry seems to have accepted it now."

"She called me Emma!" she shrieks. "Who does that?"

"Well, most people sweetie," Mary Margaret comforts gingerly.

"Yeah, well not her. It's always Miss Swan this, Sheriff Swan that!" Emma's mocks in her best Regina impression. "I'm the mother of her kid for God sake!" Emma sinks into her mother in a huff ending her tirade. Mary Margaret strokes her hair lightly.

They stay like that silent for a few moments.

"I will figure out what she's up to," Emma grumbles.

"Why does it bother you so much that she called you Emma? Would you be this mad if ANYONE else called you by your name?" Mary Margaret prods trying to help Emma uncover her own motives, a hint of irritation present in her words.

Emma's brow furrows and she concentrates hard testing different theories in her mind. "I guess, it just does," she comes to the conclusion finally. "I don't know," she adds rushed.

"I see," Mary Margaret replies remaining calm in the face of Emma's stubbornness and avoidance of true introspection. "What was going when she said your name?" Mary Margaret asks earnestly trying to help Emma figure it out.

"Nothing, I was just handing her papers," Emma huffs frustrated at the enigma that is Regina.

"Maybe she's just trying to turn over a new leaf?" Mary Margaret suggests helpfully.

"Yeah, I don't know," Emma replies skeptically.

"Well she is a very guarded person," Snow's words drift off. "Maybe she is just trying to better the relationship between you two, so Henry isn't caught in the middle," Emma continues to look skeptical of Mary Margaret's optimism in the face of Regina.

* * *

"I don't know whenever does something that seems nice or appreciative it just feels like she's mocking me or it's all a facade, a game used to exploit my generous nature." Emma explains to a rapturous listener of plight one day as she stabs her eggs with a fork at Granny's.

Mary Margaret's and Emma's conversations now focused on Regina often. Emma desperately wanted to figure out the covert brunette. Emma claimed it was to make sure Henry was safe, and that was all.

"I mean she has feelings for Henry. That's clear. I don't know about love per-say, but some kind of possessive obsession," Emma says aggressively taking a bite from her toast.

"I don't know. I think she probably does love Henry," Mary Margaret muses. "She just has a hard time knowing what to do with her feelings. She hasn't had much practice. You didn't know how bad her mother was..." Snow's words trail off as she feels internal regret at what had happened to Regina's love because of her.

"So now you're trying to make me feel bad for the Evil Queen?" Emma postulates poling her fork in her mother's direction.

"No, I don't think so," Mary Margaret considers the possibility, "just trying to help you understand that maybe she's coping the best she can with what's been thrust upon her."

"She wanted to kill you." Emma counters.

"That may be so, but I *did* cause Regina to experience a lot of true pain, even if not meaning to," Mary Margaret gazes off. "Another reason why she's not good with emotions and hides behind power," she adds placing her silverware back upon her now empty plate neatly.

Emma just smiles at how kind a person her mother is. Emma doesn't think she could ever be so forgiving and understanding, but she will try. For Henry.

* * *

"Miss Swan, to what do I owe the displeasure?" Regina greets with a fake cheerful tone.

Emma pauses and debates heading straight back out the door, but decides to continue anyway. "I'm- I'm gunna be the bigger person here and well- I'm sorry about what I said before." Emma instinctively fumbles her hands in the pockets of her red leather jacket. "You may have been a bad person before, but- er- that doesn't mean you are now or always will be. People change. Hell, I've changed. I'm still here. And it doesn't mean you can't be a good mother. Even lions I bet are good mothers and they kill loads of stuff- That's not helping, but the point is I'm sorry. And if you want to spend some time with Henry it's all fine by me, him- that's another story. You took good care of him before I got here. He's a good kid thanks to you. I know you care about him, maybe even love him in your own twisted way. Okay, well I've said my peace I'm gunna go, before you -like- turn me into a toad or something."

Emma tries leave before Regina can respond but sure enough comes the ever-present call of "Miss Swan," rings through the office and Emma stops.

"Please don't compare me to wild animals again," Regina warns, ruining whatever nice moment they may have been having. Emma just smirks to herself as she leaves. Typical Regina. "Besides, Miss Swan, you're much too riveting to spend the rest of your life as a toad," Regina comments offhandedly as Emma's half way out the door. Regina smirks down at her lap, mildly embarrassed at her own words. Leaving Emma unsure if she really heard them at all.


	6. Old Habbits Die Hard

"Henry, I'll be good! I promise. I'll be good for you!" Regina calls out to her son.

"That's not good enough!" he screams. "If the only reason you're doing good things is so that I'll like you that's not being good, that's acting good. It's not lasting! What if the reason you are acting good is taken away? What if I die? You'll just go back to the Evil Queen again!" Tears well up in his eyes as he pleads, "I can't do this! That's too much pressure. I'm just a kid. You can't depend on me like that. You have to be good because it's the right thing to do, not just so I'll like you."

Regina stands blindsided by Henry's stinging words she finds herself unable to move feeling crushed under the weight of his emotions as the boy takes his leave. Leaving Regina standing once again in the street.

* * *

"Can I tell you what Henry said? 'If the only reason you're doing good things is so that I'll like you that's not being good,'" Regina recalled. "Do you think he's right?" she asks earnestly.

"Listen, Sister- er - Mayor, if all you've got to talk to is me, you're fucked either way," Leroy reckoned, as he swiveled his bar stool to face her. Her expression clouded by the low light of Granny's at midnight and multiple drinks Leroy had already had.

* * *

"Can I come in?" Regina asks timidly standing in the open door frame faced with Mary Margret.

"What or should I say who are here for?" Mary Margaret asks unsure how to feel about Regina's presence, after her performance at the dinner.

"That's fine, Mom, I'll deal with her," Emma says as she pushes past Mary Margaret to be with Regina in the hall, shutting the door behind her.

"Emma - I - um... you're right. I'm sorry, too," Regina stumbles on her words, as she plays with her necklace, but quickly regains her demeanor . "I — shouldn't have thrown a fire ball at you. And maybe I may have overreacted, slightly."

"Wow," is all Emma can formulate as a reaction to the so out of character apology. After Emma regains her bearings she raises an eyebrow and repeats "slightly?"

Regina brushes right past Emma's bemusement to her confession.

"I've suffered a great loss in this life from the hands of someone who was supposed to love me and well it's given me a complicated perspective on love. Between possessively protective and revulsion. I push people away because if at my own hand, I can't be blindsided by their absence," Regina confesses this story with her usual superior and icy tone. A moment passes and Emma just stares at her, feeling too privy as if it was a conversation she wasn't supposed to hear.

"But I want to be the mother Henry deserves," Regina pleads, finding herself on the verge of crying, her shoulders collapsing in on themselves, heaving with convulsions as her quiet huffing become more pronounced.

Emma stands there uncomfortably, unsure if she should or how to comfort the Queen coming undone in her hallway. Emma tentatively reaches out a hand to touch the other woman's back, pulling Regina into an awkward half hug.

Regina didn't expect to have such emotions seeping out her when she came over to make peace with Henry's birth mother, but the sight of those caring eyes directed at her after all she had done to the younger woman was just too much for her to remain her composure. Regina wanted to pull away from the blonde to keep her upper hand, to keep her distance, to keep that semblance of her heart guarded. Regina wanted to not need her. Regina wanted to not want her taught arms around her shoulders. But in trying to push the blonde away she inadvertently pushed Henry away, leaving herself more alone than ever with only her guarded heart and brooding thoughts for company.

The two stayed there like that a few moments until Regina broke away, wiping her eyes self consciously.

"Old habits die hard," Emma shrugged and offered as a consolation, a half smile forming on her lips as if looking upon the broken woman with pity. "I get it."

* * *

Henry wasn't home Emma had told her as much in the hallway. He was out with grandpa David at the arcade. The memories making Regina shutter. Emma also told her that Henry didn't want to see her. This crushed Regina but was not unexpected. Emma told her to give it some time, to which Regina nodded ruefully and turned to leave.

"You know, you mother thinks I could love again," as Regina speaks the words feel strange leaving her tongue, so she follows them with a bitter laugh. "I think she's just trying to assuage her own guilt..."

"Oh, who with?" Emma asks innocent with mild interest, having a hard time imagining the mayor having a good relationship with anyone.

"That's not important," Regina replies flippantly as she takes her leave.

* * *

"Love is weakness," the words sound hallow coming from her own throat, as she collapses down onto Henry's bed clutching his pillow to her chest in pain. Breathing hard into the night air, until sleep overcomes her.


	7. Sick as our secrets

Regina fidgets with her necklace as she lingers on the fire escape, an attempt at preparing what she will say to Henry, feeling slightly embarrassed at taking Emma's poorly thought out advice to talk to Henry here.

She makes her way over to the open window and gently says "Henry, please don't just slam the window, I just want to talk. You can just listen and if you still want nothing to do with me afterwards. I'll go. I'll-I'll leave you alone," she chokes the last part out.

He stiffens at her voice, but makes no other indication that he hears her, continuing to play with his action figures, his back toward the window.

"Henry, I know my actions have hurt you, and for that I'm truly sorry. I'm no hero, and I understand if you want to be with _them_. I'm not proud of the things I've done. Surely, you know that," Regina's instincts tell her to guilt trip the tiny child into falling back to her arms, but she brushes the thought away, honestly wanting to do right by her boy. "I lash out when I'm angry and hurt and I push people away to protect myself, but look where that's got me," a confession she follows with a bitter laugh. "Magic has led me down some pretty dark paths, I must admit. It's impulsive and compulsive, then gets rather repulsive. But we are only as sick as our secrets and I don't want to have any from you anymore... I have found that the process of discovering who I really am begins with knowing who I really don't want to be anymore."

She ruffles her hair nervously and bites the bullet to continue. "And you're right, I do depend on you too much. But you're everything to me. You're all that's pure in my life. And that light is what helps me see my path forward even in my darkest days," Regina confesses. "I get that seems like a huge burden- one you didn't ask for, and I'm sorry for having put you in that position. I could really use your support, but even if you still hate me forever, I'll never stop attempting to atone for my past and I'll keep trying to do right in the future, because it's the right thing to do. My hope for is that you can learn to believe in me and trust that I can overcome my pain and this darkness inside to be the mother you deserve," she begs her voice hoarse from the lump formed in her throat. She sighs, "Anyway thanks for listening."

Henry twitches as she finishes speaking, his hands steady, no longer moving his action figures across the bed. "That's all I want," he confirms quietly. "I believe in you, if you really want to change." He really had the heart of the truest believer. "Show me that the mom I know is in there somewhere."

The tears that had been threatening to spill finally well up in Regina's eyes. "Thank you," she smiles, "that's all I could ever ask for."

As she turns to leave she hears a commotion inside. Henry has ran over to the window and looks to be attempting to pop the screen out. "Sorry, I don't know how it comes out," he informs her.

"That's okay, dear," she smiles sweetly down at her son. "Maybe later."

"Here, give me your finger. There's a hole here. I can just hold that like I did when I was real little, remember?" He asks eagerly.

"I do," she replies as she obliges his request. His little fingers gabbing the offered finger, holding hands the way they did during a much simpler time.

"Maybe we could all go to Granny's?" He suggests, wide eyed.

"I would like that," she replies, continuing to hold their connection a moment longer.

* * *

Regina forces a smile through the tension in the room as she enters the diner. Sliding into the sticky booth uncomfortably, she straightens her skirt and settles in across from Henry and Emma.

"Glad you could make it," Emma greets, almost unsure if Regina would actually come, seeing that she has gone though great leaps to avoid Emma since crying in her arms in the hallway.

Regina just nods.

"Hi!" Henry chimes, looking up from his book.

"Hello," Regina smiles.

They sit there in silence until Ruby comes by to take their orders, glancing twice at the mayor. "Thanks, Ruby," Emma tight-lips

Regina attempts to ask Henry about school, but his answers are short spoken. Regina's eyes glit around the dinner nervously, finally settling on watching Henry. Emma finds the behavior strange on the otherwise poised and confident woman, but people are staring still at her and the last time Emma saw more than a glimpse of her she crying herself raw, so Emma guesses it makes sense for her to be on edge or nervous.

The food comes as a welcomed respite from the awkward silence that has settled into the booth.

Someone's leg keeps brushing up against Regina's the whole meal and finally she cannot take it anymore. "Okay, which ever one of you kicking me, can you stop?" she appeals frustrated.

Emma and Henry both just suddenly take an intense interest in their food refusing to meet her glare. Regina rolls her eyes. "It's almost like having two children," she mutters as she gets back to her salad, seeing Emma smirk out of the corner of her eye.

"Well that was nice," Regina crisply states as they finish up.

"Was it?" Emma prods, cocking her head to the side in disbelief, thinking it was probably the most awkward lunch she ever had.

"Yes, maybe we should do it again sometime?" Regina suggests cheerfully.

"Yeah, sure, okay," Emma talks herself into it slightly, still rather unsure but not wanting to upset Regina.

"Thanks," Regina replies earnestly grasping Emma's arm lightly, smiling at the blonde.

"Uh - yeah - no problem- I mean he's your son too. Who am I to keep you from him? if that's what he wants," Emma fumbles, offering Regina a faint smile, unused to such warmth from Regina, a warmth now radiating down her arm.

* * *

The next time the words flow more freely. They even laugh. Henry opted to sit with Regina this time, leaving her practically bubbling, the pair making up for lost time. Emma nearly feels left out, but also not, because to watch people being so happy together makes her feel happiness in the pit of her stomach.

Emma's thoughts drift off to yearning for a mother like that when she was a kid, then crashing realization the woman in front of her is the reason she didn't- but also that she's not really that person anymore. It's too much for her brain to equate.

Broken from her thoughts by the sensation of someone's leg rubbing against her's. Emma looks up to find Regina watching Henry raptly as he tells her a story, then Regina swiftly turns her attention to Emma and winks, so fast Emma wasn't sure it really happened. Regina seemed so engrossed in Henry's story.

Emma decides not to dwell on the strange interaction and listens to Henry's story too.

Emma finds herself staring at Regina apparently too much during the meal for Regina cocks her eyebrow and asks, "Is there a problem, Miss Swan?"

"No, why would you think there's a problem?" Emma quips on the same level as Regina. Her eyes focused in standoff with the other woman. Well that's what Emma wished she had done, but Regina just makes her so nervous, so instead she actually replied, "No, nothing," flustered as she focused all her attention away from the brunette and down at her pile of fries, which looks considerably smaller than before she had been lost in thought.

* * *

Emma follows Regina back to the kitchen after being greeted at the door. Regina is putting the finishing touches on their meal. "Here I help with that," Emma offers as Regina and Emma both reach down for the same item their hands covering each other's. Both women stare down at the offending appendage, trying to make sense of the event, failing they look up and lock eyes in an intense glare, searching the other woman's gaze deeply.

After what felt like an eternity the women are ripped from their world by the sound of Henry's voice: "Moms, are you getting along?"

Regina quickly recoils her hand, as if she had touched a hot stove, now cradling it with her other hand.

"I don't know kid," Emma replies. "Regina's kind of a witch minus the w-" Emma stops short of spelling out the word bitch, when she feels Regina's glare burning into her back and she turns her torso towards Regina.

"Itch? My mom's an itch?" Henry questions confused.

"Yeah-" Emma replies unsure of where this is going, still making eye contact with Regina. "An itch - like uh - incessant and makes you do what it wants," Emma winces as she finishes preparing for Regina's counterblow.

Henry just shrugs and walks off confused but accepting Emma's explanation.

When Henry is out of eyeshot, Regina steps close into Emma's personal space. Emma wraps her arms around her stomach to give herself more space. Regina glowers as she digs her nails into Emma's forearm as she threatens "Don't speak ill of me to MY son."

Regina was aware she was coming on too strong, but she needed to get the upper hand and gain control after almost loosing it as their hands cupped each other earlier.

Regina lets go, her voice suddenly softer and full of vulnerability, "I can't loose him again, Emma," she pleads and then just like that the mask is replaced and she quips, "Since I _apparently_ can make you do what I want, why don't you help Henry set the table, hmmm?"


	8. Our Illustrious Mayor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you may want to reread chapter 3 before reading this one, because a minor event in that chapter is the focus of a major event here.

Regina stops by the sheriff's office to drop off some files. She strides though the office. Her shoes clack along the title floor giving Emma time to prepare for her coming arrival, but she does nothing but remain in her desk chair.

"Sheriff Swan, here are the files I told you about, now if you could please go over them and bring them back to me by lunch tomorrow and we can discuss which way we want to move forward." Regina leans toward her, over the desk to hand Emma the few file folders, their fingers brushing slightly in the exchange, which caused Regina to pull her hand back much too quickly, a reflex that went unnoticed by Emma who was rather distracted by the view down the older woman's shirt, as she hovered over the desk. Emma quickly shakes off her wandering thoughts regarding the mayor and smiles cheekily back at the woman, avoiding scowling knowing Regina would just give her more work to do.

~0~

Emma heads to Granny's to pick up some grub for her meeting with Regina. Being with Madam Mayor is always more pleasant when there is something else to busy herself with.

"Hi Rubes, I'll take the usual." Emma greets with her order as she sits down at the bar.

"No probs! Coming right up!" Ruby runs her order to the back.

"So how's my Emma today?" Ruby asks wanting to get down to the deep dish.

"I'm meeting Regina, huff. That's a load huh?" Emma half jests.

"Mhm," Ruby nods, her eye brows raising.

"I'm sensing some attitude. What's up?" Emma questions.

Ruby plays with the red steak in her hair. "You and the mayor have been spending a lot of time together, huh?"

"Okay," Emma agrees still not seeing where this is going.

"Well let's just say Regina has a type," Ruby admits coyly, almost shy, then runs off to backroom giggling.

"Ruby!" Emma calls after her, wanting a better explanation.

Ruby eventually comes back with Emma's meal in her take out bag she asked for. "I see how you two are, and you think us laypeople- we don't know, ptff," Ruby informs a bewildered Emma. "Just last week, you two stayed to have coffee and cocoa and the way you two looked at each other, I wasn't sure you weren't going to suddenly make out across the table," Ruby recalls.

"Regina does not have feelings for me," Emma protests, leaving out the lie that she has no feelings for Regina.

"Okay, captain oblivious," Ruby says before launching into a story from the past. "It's really no surprise about Madam Mayor. Lots of people kinda assumed back in the Enchanted Forrest, because she different and well- evil. It wasn't really talked about, just another black mark on her 'list of evil deeds' Ruby says in air quotes, before hastily adding, "I'm bi, by the way."

Emma attempts to react and act supportive, as Ruby just keeps rolling past her confession into more detail. "And well back there any thing deviant was frowned upon with suspicion. Hell, even her wearing pants ruffled feathers. I think maybe they were just searching for justification. Not that I was pro-Evil Queen," Ruby feels the need to justify. "She did a lot of horrible things..." her eyes glass over clearly seeing something horrific in mind. "And I was Snow's best friend. I just - I understood being different in a land where everyone was the same," Ruby sighs.

Emma sits there stunned taking in all of Ruby's words. She nods and absent mindedly munches on a French fry.

Ruby senses the mood had grown too serious so she adds flippantly "I'd totally tap that, but alas she only has eyes for you." Ruby blinks rapidly, mocking them. "Also if you ever get tired of chasing that uptight witch, you know where to find me," she winks before heading back to work.

Emma rolls her eyes before she heads out the door.

~0~

Emma brings the files over to Regina office around lunch time, well a little later. Talking to Ruby made her all nervous and she paced outside for a good while. When she finally enters, she finds the dark haired woman at her desk eating a kale salad. Emma frowns at her choice of lunch. "Well we can't all be adults," Regina smiles softly.

Emma takes the seat opposite her and reaches in the bag stuffing large handfuls of fries into her mouth, an action that causes Regina to roll her eyes, and want to seriously examine why she has any feelings about the blonde in front of her.

"Now let's get down to business, Sheriff Swan," Regina begins.

~0~

It's late at night and Emma is doing her rounds when she sees the mayor's office light still on, and decides to go check it out.

Emma knocks on the office door.

"Come in," Regina answers plainly.

Emma walks in to the see the mayor in reading glasses intensely looking over some papers. "Yes?" Regina prompts as Emma just lingers in the doorway, staring at Regina and her glasses, trying to keep all her drool in her mouth.

"Oh uh- yeah. I just uh saw your light on and came to check it out, but - uh it looks like you're good, so I'm just gunna be going," Emma fumbles trying to form a coherent sentence.

"Oh, well, thank you for rescuing me. I could have been ravished by wolves had you not come by to check, Sheriff," Regina snarks, overly animated then rolling her eyes before fixing her gaze back upon her paperwork.

Emma turns to leave. Regina acknowledges her no more.

As Emma's hand reaches the door knob, she remembers what she had been wondering about Madam Mayor and figured no better time then when it's dark, they're alone, and she seems in a playful mood.

"Why do you still wear that?" Emma snorts signaling the tiny plastic heart around Regina's neck.

"It was from Henry," Regina defends mock confusion in her voice.

"It was from me," Emma counters encroaching on Regina's personal space.

"Miss Swan, this is entirely inappropriate." Regina says quietly, leaning back slightly flustered by the quick chain of events. Emma stands her ground. Regina continues warning darkly "Miss Swan."

"No, what's entirely inappropriate is way you," Emma responds sensually leaning forward "look up and down my body." The words causing a shiver down Regina's spine as she tries to look anywhere besides Emma's chest on full display over her desk.

"I think you should leave," Regina advises darkly rising from her desk, tension flooding the room from their proximity. Regina's teeth graze across her top lip. She knows she doesn't really want Emma to leave, but she wants Emma to be sure this is what she wants too, because Regina couldn't stand the thought of Emma hating her or avoiding her. It would be better to pine in anguish.

"And what if I don't? You gunna punish me?" Emma suggests her voice laced with silk as she circles round Regina nearly whispering in her ear. Errant strands of Emma's hair grazing the side of her cheek. Regina's finger nails digging deeply into her palms, holding herself back.

"I hear the words people speak behind your back, Madam Mayor. I'm not oblivious. I know-" Emma pauses to choose her next words very carefully, "- about you."

"And what do these words say?" Regina challenges, not giving anything away with her flippant tone.

"Oh you know, nothing shocking considering your history, just that our illustrious Mayor has a soft spot for a certain— type," Emma quips popping the letter 'p' in Regina's face, circling around Regina. Regina leans gently back from Emma's encroachment.

"Is that so?" Regina comments her tone level with dark warning.

"I don't know, why don't you show me?" Emma suggests turning the tables, standing so that her legs surrounded Regina's.

"Emma," Regina cautions "you don't know what you're toying with, you should run along home to your Mommy and forget this ever happened," Regina breaths into the blondes face a mere few centimeters from her own. Regina's chest rose and fell rapidly, her breathing quiet and labored, her resistance for the blonde growing thin.

"Do you really want that, Madam Mayor?" Emma questions, taking a stand of Regina's dark hair and twisting it within her fingers as she stares into the dark eyes before her that now find themselves shrouded with hues of emotion.

Regina bites her lip to keep herself from coming undone. "Now run along home, little duckling, before you get hurt," Regina breathily pleads, her hot breath on Emma's neck, her objections becoming more a formality at this point, but laced with darkness nevertheless. She wanted this with Emma, more than anything, but something in the back of her mind was holding back.

Emma forcefully shoves Regina back down into her chair, straddling the brunette with her knees on either side of the older woman's thighs. "Why are you doing this _now_?" Regina poses the question with a slight throaty chuckle, and raised eyebrow, almost amused at the chain of events that seemed to materialize out of her own dreams, founded on only a semblance of reality.

"Damn it, Regina!" Emma slams her fist down on the arm of the chair. "Stop playing games! Stop being coy! And be a fucking human for once!" Emma's chest heaving with anger that replaced the previous arousal. "You have been brushing up against me, stoking my hand, rubbing my legs under the table, letting every touch linger far too long and flirting with me incessantly. What did you honestly want to happen?" Emma provokes.

Regina leads back surprised by the younger woman's sudden change, the sultry trance of the blonde's previous tone now splintering along with her hold over Regina's willpower.

Emma untangles herself from Regina's legs and pulls herself standing. "You know what? You're right, maybe I don't know what I'm playing with. You- you're fire. Hot and burning and unpredictable leaving only wreckage in your wake. God- I can't believe I felt sorry for you. That I felt anything for you. Am I just a game to you? Please tell me? I honestly don't know anymore!" Emma finds herself pacing around Regina's office, as the other woman just stares on in rapt attention, leaning back in her chair. "Sometimes you're so vulnerable and others times so guarded and I never know what Regina to expect when I walk in a room with you!" Emma yells, and after a breath she pleads calmer "You don't have to be this way me."

Regina opens her mouth to speak and Emma spits "Save it for someone who cares, I'm out," and with those parting words she slams the door leaving Regina dumbfounded and hurt in her wake. Maybe she wasn't the only one who was like fire.

~0~

Regina heads back into the kitchen of Granny's after closing time and all the other customers have made their leave. "Hi Madam Mayor," Ruby says startled by the sudden interruption to her cleaning up for the night. The dim yellow glow of the old florescent lighting reflected off the metal appliances casting shadows throughout the kitchen.

"Can I see you for a moment? Outside?" Regina asks as if this is a perfectly normal request of the waitress at this time of night.

Ruby leads her through the back and out the door to the alley. Once outside Regina pushes Ruby against the brick of the building. Staring into her eyes waiting, watching with anticipation, until the brown eyes before reflect the lust found in her own.

"Madam Mayor, what big eyes you have," she notes unsure if she herself is frightened or excited by the turn of events. "Madam Mayor, what red lips you have," her voice sounding breathier betraying her own need.

Regina places her lips hard against the young waitress. Ruby's long nails tangling in her short hair.

"Madam Mayor, I'm pleasantly surprised," Ruby mumbles against her cheek before kissing her back with equal force.

Ruby takes her hand and invites her, "Let's go upstairs."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry folks. Regina just can't help screwing everything up (bad pun sorry) SwanQueen is endgame. There really won't be anymore RedQueen. Things will make more sense after next chapter. Please review.


	9. Cheese

The morning light shines through the blinds to forgotten, and stirs Regina's sleeping form, her head pounding from the intrusion of the sun. Jostling slightly she brushes some hair from her face and notices her surroundings. Her hand collides with papers and she realizes she is not lying down but sitting up in her office chair, her hand draped out in front of her, where her head had previously been resting. She shakes her head to gain her bearings, not remembering how she ended up in this state. The throbbing in her cranium intensifies and she realizes the sloshing in her stomach is making it worse, so she pulls herself up, closes the curtains and goes over to the armoire and changes her shirt to look half way presentable. Dawning sunglasses she heads out the door toward Granny's.

As she arrives, she lingers by the door, suddenly hit by vivid memories of herself pressed up against Ruby. She trudges on unable to rethink of a better idea with the gnawing of her stomach taking precedent.

She flops herself down on a bar stool. Luckily for her Miss Lucas doesn't seem to be in this morning.

Regina is munching on cheese fries, not her normal fare, but a fitting remedy, when the bell chimes and in walks Emma Swan on her way to work. She slides down next to Regina. "Good Morning, Madam Mayor!" Emma greets much too loudly for Regina's comfort.

"Is it?" Regina questions. Upon looking up from her food more memories of Emma flood her senses and she feels suddenly vulnerable.

Emma reaches over and grabs some cheese fries off her plate. Regina goes to slap her hand away, but the sudden movement makes her dizzy. Noticing this Emma asks, "Rough night?"

"Well you would know," Regina replies, stirring the fries around on her plate.

"Right," Emma laughs shakily as she rubs the back of her neck. "Wait, can you read minds or can you see while you're asleep?" Emma asks suddenly puzzled.

"Why are you asking me this?" Regina replies annoyed.

"You were asleep when I saw you. How did you know I was there?" Emma still not following asks.

"How drunk were you last night?" Regina asks incredulous and mad at Emma being intentionally dense in her avoidance.

"Madam Mayor, no disrespect, but I'm not the kale person shoveling cheese fries for breakfast at the greasy town diner," Emma challenges. "No offense, Granny," she adds upon the appearance of the old woman behind the bar.

Regina has no recollection of drinking anything last night, although she certainly would have had a reason to. Was her mind playing a cruel trick? She felt very gaslit. "Okay," she concedes carefully. "What happened last night?"

"Well ya see, I was doing my rounds and I saw your light on." Regina nods along to Emma's story this all lining up so far. "I got to your door and knocked and I heard no answer, so I went in to check when I found the door unlocked. And you were slouched over in your desk chair. So I threw a blanket around your shoulders, shut off the light, and left."

"That was it?" Regina questions.

"Yepp," Emma affirms, leaving out the strange dream she had about other things happening.

"That was kind of you," Regina replies dryly.

"Hey, I am kind," Emma retorts stealing more of Regina's fries. "unlike you," Emma smiles. Regina slides the plate over to openly share, cocks her eyebrow as if to say "Look, I am kind."

"I know I shouldn't have left you there like that, but I just couldn't bare to wake you. I don't imagine a groggy mayor is my favorite kind..." Emma trails off, unnoticed by Regina who now remains deep in thought.

 _Was it all a dream then or is this the lie? If Emma's trying to convince me of a false chain of events, that's a new low. Even if I'm right, what's the harm in pretending it didn't actually happen? If this was a dream, I'm not sure I want to know what it says about my psyche,_ Regina waves off her own thoughts.

She is suddenly pulled from her rationalizations by the entrance of Ruby. Ruby looks down upon entering the diner and heads quickly to the back. She comes out later to brew more coffee behind the bar and Regina asks, "Ruby, did I come here late last night?"

Ruby smirks to herself, remembering her dream. "Are you asking if you came here to eat?" Ruby grins, remembering images of the mayor in less than official positions.

"Did you see me last night, yes or no?" Regina pressures, frustrated by Ruby's reluctance to give a straight reply. "Did I see you here in the diner?"

"Did you want to have seen me?" Ruby toys, twirling her hair.

"Ruby, I'm not in the mood," Regina replies darkly shocking Ruby to compliance.

"No, you didn't see me last night," Ruby says quickly before stomping off to the back.

Now it's Emma's turn to cock her eyebrow.

Regina shakes her head. Well that interaction didn't exactly clear up things, but that's Ruby for you, she muses.

  


~0~

"So I think I had this dream," Regina recounts as she stares up at the dank ceiling of Dr. Hopper's office.

"You think you had a dream," he muses. "That's a strange way to phrase it. What do you mean by that?"

"Well I'm not really sure if it was a dream or really happened," Regina begins.

"Madam Mayor, if you're having trouble discerning truth from fantasy, maybe that's something we should talk about," he informs.

"That's not really why I'm here," Regina smiles sourly. "I highly doubt you're an expert on the subject anyway. As I remember you believed in a false reality for 28 years. I think I'm better at discerning than you." She scowls.

Archie learns back uncomfortably. Clearly the mayor is combative today.

"Now about my dream-" Regina begins.

"- The one that may or may not have happened," he clarifies.

Regina flashes him a warning glare, causing him to visually fluster in his chair and she begins recounting the whole dream and the dynamics that go along with those involved.

When she finishes she asks him, "So what do you think that all means?" Her need for guidance surpassing all feelings about the cricket's ineffectiveness.

"What do you think it means?" he postulates. "Dreams are the work of our subconscious so what you think it means is far more valuable than what I think it means, Madam Mayor."

"I don't know," Regina replies defensively, exasperated.

"Well then let's start working through it together," he comforts her growing agitation gingerly. "Imagine the events of this dream began enfolding in reality, would you behave the same way dream Regina did?"

"I - I don't know," she says as her heart beats faster just thinking of Emma acting like that to her. It would be unheard of -an impossible reality. "It - it doesn't matter. Emma- she's not like that, persay," Regina eventually replies. "Not with me."

"Why do you say that?" he asks.

"Because- because I'm the Evil Queen okay! And she - she's the savior," the words coming out too fast shocking her own ears in her admittance.

"Well Madam Mayor, it looks to me, that you may be harboring some resentment and guilt towards you past actions that makes you question if you really deserve happiness," he treads gingerly with the easy to anger mayor. "Perhaps you feel unworthy of the savior, in the sense that you see her as much holier than thou, and so you settled on a much more morally ambiguous and less discerning lover that you may think of as eager to please, regardless of your past transgressions. Why did you choose her to be a waitress when you cast the curse?"

The question resounds in her head. "Well it's not like I choose the minute details of everyone's life. The curse just kind of ran with my subconscious and I focused on the life I wanted," Regina explains.

"I see," he notes simply.

The silence giving her time to process the beginning of his theory. A venomous denial rises to the surface "I deserve all the happiness in the world. I deserve everything I want and I will get it! Just you see, cricket who got his license from a curse!" The echo of his words ring true, but all there was to see was a woman who didn't want to look weak in a vulnerable moment.

"I'm -uh -glad you feel that way," he sputters in response to her sudden self worth outburst. Then he quickly adds about her work on the curse construction "Guess you knew me and who I could be."

Then the reality comes crashing down on Regina. All this talk of the curse makes her realize one thing. This feels like magic, dark magic.

  


~0~

The following night's dreams cause no disturbance and Regina wakes up feeling refreshed. She wanders into the station. Sitting down atop the sheriff's desk, her legs draping over the edge. She leans down to face Emma, expressing her gratitude, as she brushes a stray hair behind her ear, "Thanks for the other night," she says shyly. "That was kind of you."

"It's my duty," Emma counters, doing a two finger salute, "and my pleasure."

Regina sucks in air quickly, trying not to swoon. "Well - uh - anyway so to thank you, I - uh wanted to invite you over for lunch today, if you don't have other plans."

"No, sounds good," Emma confirms.

"Great, I'll - uh - see you later," Regina turns and leave taking one last smiling glance over her shoulder at Emma as she reaches the door. Emma responds with finger guns and Regina rolls her eyes.

~0~

"I'm making you a healthier version of grilled cheese," Regina announces as takes Emma back to her kitchen.

"I actually like that. That's really nice of you," Emma smiles.

"I am nice," Regina replies with feigned incredulousness.

Emma just smiles, not wanting to argue, seeing as how she plans to take food from Regina in the immediate future.

Regina finishes preparing the sandwich and places the plate down in front of Emma. Emma just stares at the food.

"What?" Regina questions. "It's not that healthy. It's still toasted cheese, just with apple butter, arugula, and caramelized onions. It's like a more sophisticated version of your beloved classic," she smiles.

Emma doesn't budge. "Yeah, that's not it."

"What, you think it's poisoned?" Regina quips, tossing her head back in laughter.

Emma shrugs as if to say, "Well it wouldn't be the first time you tried to poison me."

"You had no qualms eating my dinner," Regina reminds.

"That's because Henry was here," Emma counters.

"Oh yes, I'm not _so_ evil that I would poison someone in front of my son. Thank you for thinking so highly of me," Regina rolls her eyes, grabbing Emma's sandwich from the plate, taking a bite and slamming it back down. "Better?"

Emma picks up the sandwich and digs right in, making no effort to avoid the lipstick stain from Regina's bite. Smiling back at the brunette who was now she exiting the room.

  


~0~

Regina returns and sits down with Emma at the table. Breaking Emma from her thoughts and lunch Regina suddenly says "I've killed so many people, Emma. Do you think I'm a monster?" She doesn't look at Emma but out the window.

The question was posed so quietly, so pleadingly, Emma wasn't sure how to respond. "I know," she replies gingerly leaning forward, placing her hand on the other woman's knee. "You're so many things."

Regina continues to look down and bites slightly on her lip. "I never wanted to be the Evil Queen," she admits solemnly. A tone quick to change as she angrily adds, "They are the ones who put evil in front of my name."

"This kingdom made me a hell beast, so I made it hell..." she explains her mind far off inside itself. Regina suddenly keenly award of Emma's hand on her knees takes the offending appendage in hers and sets it down upon the table. Her fingers absentmindedly interlinking with the blonde's as she speaks.

"They all saw me as heartless. Nothing could have been further from the truth... I hold on too tight," the confession roles off her lips too fast to stop. Inwardly sighing she pointedly adds "I held Henry too close and he left me to find you." Regina finally meeting Emma's gaze as she ruminates. The air in the room becomes palpable as the tandem gaze continues seemingly unending. Emma breaks it off to glance down at their fingers as she does Regina suddenly snaps her back as if she touched a hot stove, cradling the afflicted fingers gently in her other hand.

"Is that why you tried to poison me?" Emma asks her eyes large in hopes of building a bridge between them.

Regina breathes deeply before saying "There were many reasons." Most of them having nothing to do with Henry.

Regina removes herself from the table, taking on a much more professional stature she calls out, "Mrs. Swan, look at the time. You should be getting back to the station, lest you anger your boss," the attempt of commanding energy faulting as a light smile forms at the edge of her lips, a slip of the mask she had so hastily donned.

"Right," Emma huffs pulling herself up, following Regina to the door. "I hear she's a real evil lady."

"Oh?" Regina raises an eyebrow. "Is that so? Then you best hope she doesn't hear you speaking like that. She might turn you into a toad," Regina mocks.

"Naw, I don't think so," Emma pretends to ponder. "She thinks I'm too pretty," an over confident dorky smile fills Emma's face, as she leans her head forward into Regina's personal space, her eyes gleam with sincerity to her jest.

Regina's crosses her arms. "Sounds farfetched to me," her dry humour accompanied by rolling eyes and a gentle shove of Emma out the door.

Once Emma leaves, Regina learns back against the closed door, releasing the breath she didn't realize she had been holding since Emma had been so close. Biting the edge of her lip in frustration.

Emma goes to pull out then glances back at the door shaking her head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so that's it that's all your RedQueen. And upon rereading this there's seems to be glimmers of unintentional one sided pinning Regal cricket, but really it's all about the SwanQueen. Hope this clears up the previous chapter (a bit) and fills you with SwanQueen feels.
> 
> Also if you are wondering that's a delicious sandwich. I generally eat it not with apple butter but some other kid of jam, but Regina would use apples and I'm sure that would be good too. #GrilledCheeseOTP


End file.
